Save My Heart (Sticks & Hearts Book 3) Read online

  Table of Contents

  SAVE MY HEART

  COPYRIGHT

  DEDICATION

  EPIGRAPH

  PROLOGUE

  CHAPTER 1

  CHAPTER 2

  CHAPTER 3

  CHAPTER 4

  CHAPTER 5

  CHAPTER 6

  CHAPTER 7

  CHAPTER 8

  CHAPTER 9

  CHAPTER 10

  CHAPTER 11

  CHAPTER 12

  CHAPTER 13

  CHAPTER 14

  CHAPTER 15

  CHAPTER 16

  CHAPTER 17

  CHAPTER 18

  CHAPTER 19

  CHAPTER 20

  CHAPTER 21

  CHAPTER 22

  CHAPTER 23

  CHAPTER 24

  CHAPTER 25

  CHAPTER 26

  EPILOGUE

  ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS

  CHAPTER ONE JERSEY GIRL

  CHAPTER TWO

  OTHER BOOKS BY RHONDA

  CONNECT WITH RHONDA

  PLAYLIST

  SAVE my

  HEART

  RHONDA JAMES

  Save My Heart

  Text Copyright © 2017 Rhonda James

  All Rights Reserved

  ISBN-13: 978-0-9984402-1-7

  ISBN-10: 0998440217

  Published by Rhonda James, Author LLC

  Cover Layout and Design by Perfect Pear Creative

  Cover Model: Francesco Triumbari

  Back Cover Models: Francesco Triumbari and Chiara M. Lowe

  Cover Image Photographer: Stefano Cavoretto

  Editing by Julia Goda

  Formatting by C.P. Smith

  No part of this book may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, or by any information storage and retrieval system without the written permission of the author, except for the use of brief quotations in a book review. This book is a work of fiction. Names, characters, and incidents are either products of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously. Any similarity to real persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental and not intended by the author.

  The following story contains mature themes, profanity, and explicit sexual situations. It is intended for adult readers.

  DEDICATION

  For my husband, Dan.

  Thank you for your love and constant support as I strive to fulfill my lifelong dream. I’m sorry for all the late night writing sessions, missed meals, and overall lack of being “mentally present’ over the course of writing this book. Thank you for keeping the house clean and juggling the many balls I’ve surely dropped over the last two years. Thank you for being every superhero all rolled into one. It’s been twenty-seven years and I’m still hopelessly and helplessly in love with you.

  EPIGRAPH

  You were the girl I watched in the library—

  Amongst the shelves. Between books.

  How I longed to be those words

  You loved, those pages you caressed.

  Earning your affection wasn’t easy—

  It took poetry, flowers, even pleading.

  You were everything I never knew I wanted.

  But exactly what I’d been needing.

  Our love was a raging wildfire—

  Burning hot and out of control.

  You gave everything—

  still, it wasn’t enough. Now, I’m the asshole.

  You’re the woman standing before me—

  Pretending I don’t exist.

  Even though I don’t blame you, I can’t turn away

  Your lips are the sweetest I’ve kissed.

  In time, I hope you’ll forgive me—

  Will you listen and maybe understand?

  It’s no longer your body I’m after.

  I’ll be happy just holding your hand.

  PROLOGUE

  SKYLAR

  Click. Snap. Click. Snap.

  The shutter on my camera opens and closes with lightning speed as Scott makes his approach. He stops a few feet from me, and I don’t miss the small smile hidden beneath the scowl he’s wearing.

  “What are you doing, Sky?” He groans when I snap one more before lowering the camera to my side. “You need to find another subject.”

  A sheepish grin forms on my lips as I close the short distance between us. “I’m capturing this moment for posterity.” He makes a disgruntled noise in the back of his throat, but his arms wrap protectively around my waist. “Don’t grumble at me, Scott Rivers. You were amazing out there tonight. Twenty-five saves! That’s bound to be a record. Right?” I push up on my toes and plant a kiss on his cheek

  Tonight, our school went up against one of our biggest rivals in the division. Of course, Leland won. Scott is Leland High’s starting goalie and the best around. So good in fact, he was recruited to play for Great Lakes University after graduation. Which means, in just three short months, he’ll be leaving me.

  “Nope. There’s a senior in Minnesota who just made twenty-eight,” he corrects me.

  “Pish-posh. A measly three shots. I still say you could beat him in your sleep.”

  “Our defense sucked ass tonight. I just had to work a little harder.”

  “That’s what makes you the best player out there.” I beam proudly.

  I lean in to give him another teasing peck, but this time he doesn’t allow me to pull away. One hand weaves its way into my hair, and his lips momentarily connect with mine before I draw back and give him a playful shove.

  “Boy, I give one little compliment and you automatically think you can take advantage of my sweetness.” I cock my head and give him a touch of attitude. “Maybe I didn’t want you to kiss me. You ever think of that?”

  A small smile flirts with the corners of his mouth, and his gaze darkens as his hands fall to my hips. “Is that so? Well, I happen to have it on good authority that your toes curl whenever I kiss you.”

  I swallow the giggle forming in my throat then lower my voice to whisper in his left ear. “Nu-uh. Your kisses don’t have that kind of effect on me. If anything, they bother me.”

  “Is that a fact? Well, too bad, Blondie, because I happen to love bothering you,” he drawls, and his voice is raspy with want. “In fact, I plan on bothering you all night. Tomorrow, too. If you’ll let me.”

  “Really?” I can’t help smiling, because all kidding aside, I really do love being in his arms. I don’t think I’ve ever felt as safe as during those moments when he’s holding me. Kissing me. Loving me. I step into his open arms and tilt my face up to look into his eyes. “I can’t think of anyone I’d rather be bothered by.” My lips part, and I feel the slow slide of his tongue as it meets my own. The hand in my hair tightens, drawing me tighter against his hard body, and he nibbles on my bottom lip before fully breaking away.

  “You’re good for my ego. You know that, Dennison?”

  “I knew there had to be a reason you keep me around.” I poke him in the side with my finger. My tone is playful, but inside, I’m serious as a heart attack. Why does he keep me around?

  We couldn’t be more opposite if we tried. He’s insanely gorgeous. I’m somewhat average-looking. He comes from a close-knit family that’s warm and loving. I’m an only child whose mother is rarely ever home. Scott is extremely popular and school would probably shut down if he didn’t show up. And me? Well, I’m not a social outcast, but let’s just say I could stay away for two weeks and can count on one hand how many people would notice.

  “Hey.” He takes me by the arm and guides me into a darkened storage closet. Before I know it, my back is pressed against the closed door
and his arms are on either side of me, caging me in. “Stop tearing yourself down. You know how much I hate it when you do that. There are many reasons for us to be together, and none of them include you worshiping the ground I walk on.”

  I open my mouth to protest, but he cuts me off with another kiss that nearly sweeps me off my feet. For the moment, his kisses make me forget our differences. He nips and pecks his way across my jaw, teasing my skin with an occasional flick of his warm tongue. This feels so good. He feels so good. Strong hands meet the back of my thighs and I’m lifted off the ground. My legs instinctively wrap around his narrow waist and lock at the ankles, while my arms cling to his neck. Hanging on as if my very life depends on staying this way. Sometimes I think maybe it does.

  His lean body bears down against mine, and I don’t miss the hard press of his erection between my parted legs. I won’t deny I love having him this close. Love the feel of his breath on my skin. The weight of his body pressed against me and the press and pull of our tangled mouths as his tongue melds with mine.

  If only this was all he needed from me.

  I’ll admit he’s been very patient with me. But I know his patience is bound to be wearing thin. I mean, a guy like Scott can only handle so much teasing from his friends before his resolve begins to crack.

  This is our last year of high school. We’ve known each other most of our lives, but we only began dating last October after he approached me in the library. I love going to the library, love getting lost between the pages of a book. For weeks, I would see him there with his friends, and from the corner of my eye, I would catch him watching me. Most of the time, I would pretend I hadn’t seen him, then one day, something happened, and when our eyes met, I held his gaze. There was something about the way he looked at me, almost as if he could see right through me. As if he suddenly knew all my secrets and dreams. I’ve always noticed Scott Rivers. Of course, I have. He’s pretty hard to miss. But that day I saw something different. Something more than just the outward appearance the whole school is privy to. I remember going home that night wondering if I’d somehow been able to see through him as well. Two days later, on a warm October afternoon, he joined me at my table, and before I knew it, we were dating. Being with him was easy, and for the first time in my life, I felt alive; but after a few days, I knew our differences surpassed anything I could have ever imagined. Despite all my protesting, he still wanted to be with me. I immediately told him I was a virgin. I figured there was no sense in pretending to be someone I’m not. I’m sure my little revelation hadn’t come as a surprise. I’m not exactly popular. Or exceptionally pretty, for that matter. Scott is the star goalie for the hockey team. Homecoming King. Adored by everyone. Desired by many. He could have any girl he wants. But he chose me.

  “W-why me?” I blurt against the press of his lips. Even though I’ve asked him this question before and I know the answer, my own insecurities beg to hear him tell me again. “You could have any girl at this school. Probably anywhere. What made you choose me?” My voice drops to barely a whisper, and my hands fidget at my sides. “I’m nobody special. Not like all of them.”

  “Don’t,” he warns. “We’ve been over this before, Sky.” His hand comes up to tuck a few wayward strands of hair behind one ear. He kisses one side of my mouth and then the other. Looks me in the eye and lifts the corners of his mouth up into a sly smile.

  “I’m attracted to you, because you’re not like the other girls in this school. You’re beautiful. Smart. Yet you don’t hang on every word I say. You have a mind of your own. I like being with you, because I can have an actual conversation with you. Those are the things that attracted me to you, but I stay with you, because for some crazy reason you seem to like me.” He laughs softly. “All that aside, at the end of the day, there’s no one else I’d rather have in my arms.” He bumps the end of my nose with the tip of his finger and uses his other arm to draw me closer.

  I sag against him, literally melting against the sculpted muscles that make up his chest. Resting my chin on a defined pec, eyes smiling as I peer up at him. “How is it that one minute I feel unworthy, then you go and say something like that and I feel like the most beautiful girl in the world?”

  “That’s easy, Blondie. To me, you are the most beautiful girl in the world.” He dips his head and kisses both my cheeks. Devouring me with his beautiful mouth. We break apart, and I’m dizzy. Warm all over. He cups the side of my face in his big hand and runs the tip of his thumb over lips he just sampled. The look on his face says he’s thinking of tasting them again. The look I give in return says I’d love to be his next meal. “I’m crazy about you, Skylar Dennison, and there’s nothing you’ll ever say or do to change that.”

  “Promise?” I whisper.

  “Promise,” he answers before settling his lips on mine once more.

  ***

  Weeks pass and things continue heating up between us. Most of our time together is divided between hanging out in the library pretending to study or watching movies in his bedroom. Well, the movies are usually running as background noise while we kiss and touch until both of us are so worked up we need a shower after we part ways.

  Tonight, we’re grabbing a pizza and heading straight back to his place. After many discussions—and a great deal of thinking on my part—I think I may be ready to take our relationship to the next level. For the past week, Scott’s seemed a little preoccupied. I can’t put my finger on it, but it’s hard not to jump to conclusions and wonder if there may be someone else he’s interested in. I know it sounds stupid and I’m probably doing it for all the wrong reasons, but yesterday between classes, I caught Scott in the library stacks, and he wasn’t alone. His former girlfriend, Rachel Westin, had him cornered, and her hands were all over him. He never touched her, but he also didn’t stop her from touching him. Rachel’s been dying to get her claws into him again, and she hates me with a passion. At one point, she leaned in and whispered something in his ear before kissing him on the cheek and walking away. The look on his face and the way he watched her go nearly took the breath right out of me. I can only assume what she said. But there was no denying how he felt about it, especially because I know just how far she’d been willing to go while they were dating. Until that moment, I never had a reason to doubt him. Girls are always coming onto him and he blows them off. But these past few days he’s been different. Quiet. A little more distant than usual. It’s hard to explain, but whatever it is, I don’t like it. Seeing the two of them together opened my eyes to the realization that his kisses have blinded me to the cold, hard truth. He really is out of my league.

  Maybe I’m crazy for thinking this will keep Rachel and the others at bay. I don’t know. I guess I’m just afraid he’ll grow tired of waiting and I’ll lose him.

  Common sense niggles at the back of my brain, arguing that if he dumps me for not sleeping with him, then he isn’t the guy I want to give myself to.

  But I ignore those warnings.

  “Where do you think you’re running off to, missy?” My mother’s raspy voice beckons as I try and sneak past the kitchen on my way out the door. My shoulders slump as I stop and backtrack a few steps before turning to face her.

  She’s sitting at the kitchen table. An ever-present cigarette dangles from her mouth and a half empty bottle of whiskey sits next to the pile of papers she’s sorting. At one time, my mother had been an attractive woman with long, brown hair and vibrant eyes. I only know this from old photos I once found in a box hidden beneath her bed. Ever since I can remember, she’s always looked the same. Her hair is cut way too short for her thin face. Clothes way too tight for her frail body. Voice rough from too many years of smoking. And a constant frown where a smile should be.

  Growing up, most of my friends’ mothers were always happy and baked cookies for their family. I can’t remember the last time my mother baked. And she hasn’t been happy since the day I was born. Her words, not mine.

  I’ve never met my father. He wal
ked out of our lives the day Mom told him she was pregnant. Guess that explains the loss of happiness.

  I stuff my hands in my pockets and lean against the doorjamb. “I already told you. I’m meeting Julia at the mall and we’re going to grab a bite to eat before catching a movie. I’ll be home by midnight.” The lie falls easily past my lips.

  She lifts her chin and levels me with a hardened stare. When she opens her mouth, a trail of smoke follows each spoken word. “That boy. The one you’re always chasing after. Will he be there?”

  The hairs on the back of my neck prickle, and I return her stare with my own firmly set jaw. “That boy? Mother, Scott is my boyfriend. You already know this. I don’t chase after him. We’ve been dating nearly six months.” I can’t help throwing in an exaggerated eye roll, but she just waves it off.

  “Maybe so, but that still doesn’t answer my question.” She narrows suspicious eyes at me, waiting for me to cave. When I don’t, she twists the blade of insecurity a little deeper, knowing just how much it hurts me. “You know, Skylar, boys like Scott Rivers don’t fall in love with girls like you. He’ll say all the right things, but in the end, he’s just using you for sex. One day, he’ll find himself a much prettier girl. A girl he’s not ashamed to be seen in public with. A friendly piece of advice: keep your legs closed. The minute you let him in your pants, he’ll drop you like a dirty dishrag.” She takes a deep drag of her cigarette, holds it a moment, then a long stream of smoke wafts from her nostrils. “Mark my words, baby. Boys like him will only break your heart.”

  My chest heaves in frustration as I fight to keep my emotions in check. I’ve heard this warning so many times. And to be truthful, I’m sick and tired of it. I honestly don’t believe she’s trying to hurt me. She’s just a bitter woman who doesn’t believe in love and can’t stand seeing me happy. Isn’t it enough I already question what it is he sees in me? Or that some nights I cry myself to sleep because I worry one day he’ll open his eyes and realize I’m not good enough for him?